Do you remember the last time you had a conversation with anyone that didn’t eventually wind its way back to COVID-19? For a few months, the pandemic was the only item in the news. We were inundated with revolving and evolving statistics and guidelines. And then came the never ending rotation of speculation and opinion. I woke up one day and genuinely couldn’t remember what we used to talk about. While I am thankful for all of those COVID crisis conversations with my friends, I became exhausted by the subject matter. Inspired to bolster a friend on a particularly rough mental health day, I vowed to talk about anything but COVID. And then, holy smokes — I drew a complete blank.
So I asked my friends. What did we used to talk about? What new things can we talk about? Can we be both informed citizens and multi-dimensional? Here are the results:
29 things to talk about that aren’t COVID-19:
- The weather. Hurricane season is here after all. And so are cooler temperatures.
- Sports. Because they are happening. And also, sports teams, players, and organizations are showing their depth and moxie wading into waters outside of the game.
- New recipes. It’s more than bread starters, which I sadly never did. We are eating at home and trying lots of new recipes, many I’ve received from friends.
- New people to follow on socials. Anyone else give their socials a makeover? As my circumstances have changed, I have added more female voices, entrepreneurs, and people of color to my favorites.
- Your latest find at Trader Joe’s. Bless you Trader Joe’s and your seasonal stock.
- New music, your favorite song or current playlist. I haven’t seen a live band in far too long but music continues to be my love language. I’ve discovered new artists, new genres, and even new favorite songs that speak to my heart.
- All.the.books. We are going to the library twice a week these days and taking the time to read the hard stuff and the fluff. I am a whodunit fan through and through and I’ve found several new authors through conversations with others.
- Work. I started my own company two weeks before we sheltered in place. At first I was afraid to share what I was doing because it seemed wrong to be so excited under such grave global circumstances. But you know what, whether it’s an old job, new job, or no job, our jobs define our days and that’s something worth talking about.
- Gardens and other hobbies. Did you know 33 million more households added a garden this year? Soil, fertilizer, watering schedules, what grew, what didn’t grow, and how fat the local squirrels have gotten are all great not-COVID topics to cover.
- Catch up with family or friends. It’s not gossip, it’s staying in the loop. Who had a baby, who is getting married, what’s going on out there?
- Games your kids are teaching you. You’re a proxy expert by now.
- The kids — because they aren’t sitting quietly…what are they up to? I have a high school senior!!
- Plans — even if it looks different. Just skip the part about WHY they look different. We are adding events to the calendar and making plans about our futures, and finding new opportunities to honor our values.
- Homework. Because you’re a teacher, a student, or you know a teacher or a student. And not so much about how your kid is going to school (because that turns into COVID-19 numbers in a hurry) but maybe what they are learning, what’s working, etc. We love our kids and I know we watch for opportunities to see them really shine!
- All.the.other.news. Whether it’s national, local, or global, there is so much happening right now from civil rights issues to wildfires to elections. It’s like a spy novel out there.
- Road construction — otherwise known as all the ways Wichita doesn’t want me to get inside the city limits. I would still be trapped in orange cones without conversations about which roads are actually open.
- Your community: Local government, new parks opening, what happened at the swimming pool this summer, the golf tournament last weekend (for example, just because you turned your back to your golf buddies doesn’t hide you from those of us sitting on my back deck. I can never unsee that, sir).
- Your recent volunteer activities. I can tell you all about a virtual fundraiser I’m working on and NEVER mention why it’s virtual.
- Your most recent date night, girls night, out of the house moments
- Tough conversations that you’ve put off like social injustice, protests, white privilege and racism.
- TV shows, movies. What’s everyone watching right now?
- Exercise. Anyone running longer or faster, walking new routes, loving the new drive-in boot camps?
- How tired we all are…because that hasn’t changed!
- The holidays — who is putting up their Christmas tree in October this year?
- Your latest home improvement projects. We did two bathroom remodels so far, anyone else?
- Your mental state. For many of us, anxiety isn’t new, bouts of impostor syndrome that threaten our ability to get up in the morning happened years ago and happened yesterday, we can’t be afraid to ask someone how they are….like really how are you. It’s not always about the pandemic.
- Your physical well-being. I have a friend battling cancer, another friend who broke her ankle. It’s okay to talk about sore backs and hangovers and insomnia too.
- Pets. I love reading about empty shelters, waiting lists at rescues, and seeing all the new puppies and kittens. I didn’t get any new pets but the two I have might be reaching an all new level of spoiled.
- Plants. As in, did anyone else turn into a plant lady recently? Anyone else in over their heads?
While all conversations happen in the shadow of a global health crisis, they don’t have to be about the pandemic. It’s not fluff. It’s not small talk. You can take any topic and make it fit your style of communication and the time allotted. Just don’t hold back, don’t get sucked into the “easy” of making everything about COVID-19.
And don’t fall victim to the exhaustion that comes from carrying the emotional weight of a global crisis. Oh my goodness it feels so good to talk about EVERYTHING ELSE. Even deep discussions into foreign dictators or criminal justice reform (I live with a high school debater) can spark our energy, creativity, and ignite our compassion for others. I’m not advocating we ignore COVID-19, because how would that even happen. But I am suggesting we are bigger than one issue (no matter how looming) and our conversations can reflect that fact.
