You’re not alone, friend. You don’t have to figure it out by yourself. I want to share how mentors have changed my life!
Last December, I picked a phrase for 2020: “Quit going it alone.” Little did I know how much I’d need it this year, right?
Mentors come in all shapes and forms – here are some ways for you to find the encouragement and accountability so you won’t have to “go it alone” anymore either.
No matter what your relationship is with your own mom, I think motherhood is a learned skill, as well as an intuitive urge. I need some help over here!
An older mom is an invaluable friend and mentor at each stage. I’d look around at who is already in your circles; an aunt, a lady from a church or civic group, someone in your community, even someone from your past. Look for someone who has something in common, who has walked a similar path, and ask her to coffee or send a message.
My friend Jana knows the challenges of the fire department life, and has three boys (like me!) that she raised to adulthood. Tami knows my family and community (and she owns the coffee shop!) If you have littles, it’s calming to be told by an empty-nester that you will survive, that you’re doing well. If you’re a mom of college kids, find another mom who has walked that road.
You can be mentored by moms you’ve never met! This is the goal of Wichita Mom, our community groups, and events. Read our articles, ask those questions, come to an event and be uplifted.
Moms who are my age (and still in the trenches) are incredibly inspiring too. Last winter, five of us got together for takeout and to watch Steel Magnolias. These girlfriends know, you know? They remind me stuff like that household chores make a great consequence for kids’ bad choices, while also telling me to take an afternoon off and get sno cones!
For years, I just did the best I could to grow in my career. I’m so grateful for the many mentors and coaches that I found through books and courses. If you have a library card, you have access to the genius of people in your field! I’ve loved You’re A Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero, The Next Right Thing by Emily Freeman, and Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert.
There are so many valuable webinars and tools for free as well. Then, when you’re ready to level up and put some skin in the game, buy a course from a mentor that you love. I could have never learned so well or so quickly without them!
You may still have questions and need some community, right? Joining a group coaching mastermind, through Your Blogging Mentor, has been amazing for me! Locally, The Hive offers women a unique blend of co-working space, workshops and community. We are stronger together!
Then sometimes, it’s time to get a 1:1 business coach. Find one that you click with, and ask around for recommendations. Maybe an upper level person at your company would be willing to come alongside you. When I was in journalism, the editor was an amazing teacher.
The accountability of a coach is really vital for me, as well as having someone to give me nudges towards being braver.
A couple years ago, I had a panic attack (over a dumb text message) and decided right then to book my first session with a therapist. She taught me such valuable tools and really mentored me in caring for my mind.
I realize that sometimes we aren’t in a situation where we can go to traditional therapy. I’m constantly blessed by therapists and life coaches who create content and post online. Here’s two of my local faves: Jessica Stong at Lives of Courage gives you ways to actually change your brain and mindset; Emily Stevens has taught me so much about anxiety and I look forward to her daily affirmations!
My husband and I recently decided that we needed marriage maintenance. We found a fantastic life coach to give us an action plan that helps us achieve goals while growing closer. After twelve years of marriage, it’s wonderful to have help to fine tune the areas where we were stuck.
Maybe in reading through this, someone has come to mind who you’d love to have as a mentor. Reach out to them. Reach out to our community groups. You deserve to have someone in your corner!