One of the greatest weaknesses we possess is not realizing how much we have to learn from our elders before they are gone. Their knowledge and history are incredibly important to us, we just don’t realize it in time.
I lost my grandfather recently; and while I’m heartbroken, what an incredible life he led! He was a delight to be around; to be that photogenic in all of the pre-digital-photo-era pictures, you have to be a truly happy. Happy and smiling at all of the games, events and parties. Honestly, he made us all tired with his incredibly active life…if you needed to know what was happening in Wichita, he was the man to call.
Over the past couple of weeks, as I’ve thought of a number of things to talk to him about ‘next time I see him’ or to the kids ‘that’s a great question, we should call Papa and ask him’ and then I remember…and I realize how much we learned from him over the years.
My grandfather lived a long life, which gave me the benefit of time to get to know him and ask almost all of my questions.
As he’s been on my mind so often, it reminds me of how lucky my own kids are. Kids that grow up in agriculture are incredibly blessed with the gift of their parents and grandparents time. They always have someone over their shoulder explaining how and why we do things. Generations of knowledge passed down through instruction on how and why we do things. Over the shoulder of a child the history of every now-missing-building in a pasture, all the crops they’ve tried over the years in each field, how we care for this or that, and work ethic. What an incredible gift these lessons are, mixed in with 1000’s of stories they are learning about their own history, even if they don’t realize it. I am so envious!
As I think of the influence my own grandfather had on my life; my appreciation of and taste in art from his near constant explanations on trips I took with him. Politics were always a hot topic, of course, and I loved talking to him about history- how much things change, how much they stay the same …he was a STAR during our homeschool COVID time – the kids and I would hammer him with questions, oh how much we learned!
In his 95 years he lived through a lot. ‘Lost some cousins and the family doctor’ to the Spanish flu, served in the Air Force during WWII, loved to fly, loved the 50s with his young family and big dreams…a different time, for sure. He loved his travels; we even made an excel spreadsheet of all of the countries he’d visited in his lifetime (over 130!). He loved his big family, but that he had the opportunity to know his ten great-grandchildren so well made him the most proud.
When I said goodbye to him just before he passed, I told him that I wasn’t ready for him to go, I still had so many questions!
He laughed.
But I also told him how grateful I was for him and how much I was going to miss him.
And he replied “I love you darlin’.”
He loved sending me articles in the mail he cut out of the paper or magazine he thought I should read, and just a couple of months ago sent a book on economics in which he inscribed:
“…made a deep impression on me; and I hope that, 75 years later, you will also be impressed (and enlightened). Papa”
I wish for our children to be both impressed and enlightened by their elders.
Teach them to take the time to get to know their grandparents stories, their take on history, what they remember about….well, everything. And your stories too…
It’s important.
I am lucky to have had all of the years with him before he passed. It makes me think of all of the things I could have learned from my other grandparents before they passed, or things I would have learned if I’d just had one more year…if i’d only realize how much I’d care someday.
