“Time you enjoy is not wasted time.”
“Time flies.”
“Time is of the essence.”
“Time heals all wounds.”
I think we would all agree that time is precious, but it can also be a thief.
As we all are well aware, time is fleeting… especially when you become a parent. I think any parent can attest to how much time seems to fly by once we have children. Recently someone who isn’t yet a parent said to me that, since they don’t have children, they don’t have much to put time into perspective for them so they still feel the same as they always have. I wasn’t sure what exactly that meant, but I’m sure it had something to do with feeling young… just a wild guess. Ha! But really… our children put time into so much perspective, don’t they?
Children. Marriage. Family. Work. Housekeeping. Volunteering. Church. Paying bills. Grocery shopping. Cooking meals. Helping with homework. Birthday parties. Extracurricular activities for kids. Bedtime routines. Self-care (i.e. working out, personal upkeep, etc). Notice how self-care is mentioned last… I think us as mothers could all agree this needs to be moved more towards the forefront of our priorities.
Thinking of all of the above brings me to a dilemma I have often fought with since becoming a mother: What is left of ‘our’ time? And with what is left of our time, what do we choose do with it? Who do we spend it with? What do we spend our time doing?
A million answers exist to each of these questions. I’m sure each of you reading this is thinking “oh goodness, the things I can think of doing!” Yes, I hear you… loud and clear, trust me. But what we think of doing and what we actually do are two different things, right?
I often hear others expressing how they get stuck in their own routines. I, too, am guilty of the same. It’s easy to get caught up in a cycle of all-thing kids, school, extracurricular activities, work, deadlines, bathtimes, bedtimes, etc. But, what I’ve noticed is when I break that cycle, I find that sweet spot of “me” time that typically means spending time connecting with the people/things that mean the most to me. Where we choose to spend our time and who we choose to spend it with says a lot about us and what means the most to us in our lives.
I often wonder if the ways of the technological world are fueling us to spend more of our time alone versus connecting with others. I recently read an article about loneliness that hit me in the heart. It stated that research has demonstrated that “loneliness is as physically dangerous as smoking 15 cigarettes a day and contributes to cognitive decline, including a more rapid advance of Alzheimer’s Disease.” This made me think: “Could curing loneliness lead to curing many other ailments of life?” Or maybe not ‘curing’ loneliness, but rather increasing connection? Either way, what a great challenge to give ourselves!
Although I always have room for improvement in this area of life, I have always believed that the most precious gift we could give to anyone (including ourselves) is simply our time.
When prioritizing my extra time away from obligations, I consider a few things that help me in keeping a balanced life:
- Is how I am spending my time and who I am spending my time with allowing me to grow/connect with myself/others?
Take time to evaluate who you are and where you would like to continue to grow. This also means who you would like to continue to grow alongside. Do you help each other flourish? Is there a mutual support?
2. Am I around people who are positive and encouraging?
Part of connection and giving our time to others is building trust by encouraging and being “of service,” even if it just means lending an ear to listen.
3. Is where I am spending my time worth not being with my family?
Our time with our families is priceless. Our time outside of work/commitments is limited. Is who we are spending our time with and what we spend our time doing worthy of not being with our family? Do the people in your presence value you as you value them? Do they encourage and support you? Does what you are doing bring you joy and contentment?
Truth is, we’re never too busy for our priorities. What ways do you use your extra time to fuel the important connections in your life? Where (and with whom) do you give your time? Time is precious—use it wisely.
Make sure you never miss out on things to do in Wichita: subscribe to our weekly Wichita Moms Blog newsletter! Be the first to know about our exclusive events, special offers and discounts, neighborhood group activities and, of course, local resources and parenting voices powered by local Wichita moms!
